If you've made it here, to the About page, then there's a very good chance we should connect at some point. I'm guessing that you're a curious type, keen on continually growing as a person, you love clear thinking and good ideas, and want to live a life that matters. (Either that or my mother told you to search for me....)
Typically, my visitors and connections are in midlife (roughly, 45 to 65), have experienced some big challenges, and feel like they want life to be clearer, simpler and more fulfilling. Sometimes that's about having renewed purpose, sometimes about changing the way you work, and other times it's about reinventing yourself to make the most of life from hereon. Woo-hoo to all of those!
OK, Rob, Who on Earth Are You? (And Where'd Your Name Come From?)
Good questions because there' re lots of voices out there, everybody's got an opinion (or a list to subscribe to), and it's hard to know who the hell should you pay attention to, right?
Firstly, the name is Polish because my parents were refugees from there in the second World War, and from the age of about 6 they ended up in New Zealand for the rest of their lives. It's an inspiring story, I can tell you. But I was born here, so I'm a Kiwi.
Secondly, in a nutshell, I'm an ordinary guy in my fifties, I live in New Zealand, have three adult children, an emerging collection of nieces, nephews and grandchildren, and have successfully navigated many of Life's challenges. They've included being abandoned by my mother when I was two and getting a new one when I was six, self-doubt, depression, divorce (after 29 years), losing money, taking a few career wrong turns, losing relatives and friends to early deaths, experiencing my partner's breast cancer, leaving a long-term faith, feeling very dislocated, etc. I'm certainly not trying to boast (nor looking for a "poor you") and am very aware there are millions of others whose own lives have been filled with much greater difficulty than mine.
Good God! Why Should I Keep Reading?!
Another great question, and totally fair enough. In essence, because you should always pay attention to people primarily because of who they are, and then because of what they say. The first is about character, the second about content. If I and my story resonate with you, then stay tuned. If not, then I sincerely wish you all the best.
If I was to get my thing into as few words as possible, it's probably this:
I present practical wisdom
from real-life experiences.
More broadly, my own quest is to live a life, and do work, that matters (and have fun doing it). I mean that matters to me, to others, and to the world we all live in. My work is to inspire and help others who want to do the same through my writing, talking, broadcasting and coaching. I go into this further in my short book A Life That Matters, and you can get a FREE pdf copy here.
What Are Your Qualifications and Work Background?
The official (read: need to look and sound credible online and with clients) version is that since 1997 I've been a coach and facilitator with lots of corporates and professional service firms. Outfits like law firms, banks, airlines, insurance companies and the like. Mostly helping people become better at communication and leadership with colleagues, clients and audiences. And it's been great. I've enjoyed it and become much better myself along the way. Like doing a sort of 'living MBA.'
I've also got a science degree (knowing my twenty-year-old self, heaven knows how that happened!) and a teacher's diploma, have completed Radio New Zealand's broadcasting school and completed Masters level papers in organisational leadership and training. Plus, I've learned an enormous amount about people, self, relationships, philosophy, psychology, change and leadership from first-hand experience, coaching others, and years of dedicated reading and study.
However, what's far more important than all of that is...
My Philosophy and Approach to Life
Quite simply, I believe that:
Not everything matters
And life is short
So, we should live accordingly.
And rather than that being an open invitation to throw caution to the wind and party up large - trying to fit in with Society's norms and trends, accumulating as many toys as possible (read: rampant consumerism, busyness and stress) - it's actually the reverse. It's a philosophy of experiencing more of what really matters and focusing on less of what doesn't.
That means having fewer commitments, less distraction, being less busy, having less stuff and experiencing less stress.
And the more part? Having more clarity, more intention, more connection, more contribution, more calm, and much more satisfaction and fulfilment.
Now, if you're still with me, then we're definitely a good fit. So, let me tell you some of my story.
Here's My Life in Bullet Points
Abandoned by my mother at the age of two (it probably cost me years of sub-conscious angst but don't worry, we get on fine now). So, I currently have two mothers, but out of respect only one Mum, if you get my drift.
As a teenager I usually felt a bit out of the group and often quietly believed there was something wrong with me or with who I was - I was lonely a fair bit of the time, even into my twenties.
I performed and talked a lot at school and was always told to speak less (I got my own back years later by becoming a radio announcer and actually getting paid to talk!)
I tried going out on a limb and following big dreams of making a difference in the world. (Nothing came easy, and most of my dreams didn't come to fruition. I was probably a bit too judgemental too. But we had some really great experiences across New Zealand and around the world.)
I consciously reinvented my life on three occasions (at 28, 37 and 54 years old) and, although it wasn't easy (and, in retrospect, probably cost me too much money and affected the family's stability too much), it was worth it overall. Those times involved changing where I lived, what I did for work, and my financial situation, and, in the latest occasion only, my entire belief system and many close relationships. Very hard, but still worth it.
I've always struggled with being my true self. Instead, I've inadvertently copied everyone else - the guitar they played, the car they drove, the music they liked, the subjects they coached, the organisations they worked with, the branding they had...…know what I mean? It's only in the last 12 to 24 months that I've started to get on top of this. And it mostly involves letting go and removing the layers accumulated over the decades. I guess it was a safety thing.
In recent years I've re-discovered (read: finally admitted to and made room for) my love of travel (hence my solo trip around the world in 2016), a broad range in music, playing the guitar (not too shabby at that), broadcasting (hence the podcast and videos), and time out in Nature. [See any themes?!?]
Now that's probably enough to give any psychoanalyst a field day. But what I wanted to convey was this: I'm just like you in many ways, I care very much about what's real and important, I want to feel free, I want to enjoy life, and I want my life to matter.
While I'm still a work in progress, today I can confidently say, 'tick, tick, tick, tick and tick' to the above. I have the strategies and outcomes (i.e. scars and successes) to prove it.
What I Give, What You Get
So what I offer you is things like connection, inspiration, clarity, honesty, education, guidance and wisdom.
What you get is things like reassurance, encouragement, insights, strategies and confidence to be who you really are, and to live the life you want.
Rob, How Do You Make Money?
It's a tough one. I want to do this full time, but as of today I still need an income. That comes from my corporate coaching and consulting work. I don't use advertising on my site/podcast , etc. (I hate advertising - To me it's violating and annoying by its ubiquitousness), nor do I have any sponsors (isn't that the same thing?).
I'm working towards earning income from online courses I've created, speaking engagements, and mentoring others (both one-on-one and group mentoring programmes like A Year That Matters). As the work grows, I will seek supporters through Patreon.
So, until the latter overtakes the former, I'm rolling up my sleeves and making time to do both. Quite a juggling act.
Of course, there's always winning Lotto.
Can I Contact You?
Of course. But not if you're a Russian troll farm. Or have the name, Lolita. My email address is rob (at) robbialostocki (dot) com. [See what I did there? Da. Voss verry trricky.]
I would love to hear from you, regardless of what you have to say, and will try to get back to you as soon as I can. I'm particularly keen on hearing about your life and work situation, what your concerns or challenges are, and what you would like to achieve. Or, just sharing a story about midlife, navigating change, working for yourself, or living a life that matters. Or, even just sharing about someone else's example, someone you admire. Especially if they're not famous like Richard Branson, Tony Robbins or Ariana Huffington. There's way too much of that already.
What About Social Media?
Sure...but first let me say this. I have a love/hate relationship with social media mainly because there's so much tripe out there. Far too much noise, much of it unhelpful, most of it vainglorious. But, and here's the thing, it's handy for spreading the word (ironic, I know) when you have something important to share. Plus, images are a powerful carrier of meaning and can add nicely to the overall message.
So, absolutely yes. Click the buttons below:
And How Can I Know When You Publish Something New?
Easy. Subscribe below (you can opt out any time).
Are You Still Single?
Ha! Nice of you to ask. But, no. I had the idea of getting the personalised numberplate 'Taken' with my wife getting 'Taken 2'. But then I thought, hang on. Personalised number plates are a waste of time. And how often do you see those appalling, deliberate spelling MI5TAKS?
I H8 THT.
So I didn't. :)
And So, What About You?
I would love to hear from (true!) so why not send me an email and tell me a little about what your current thoughts, goals and challenges are. I’ll respond as soon as I can.